Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Can we just add maybe a few more hours to the day so things can get done!? I have a list of 28435740 things to do and get done. THE NEVER ENDING LIST. Cross off 3 add another 2. My mind is ALWAYS on the go. I swear.
I purchased the wrong "app" on my phone the other day thinking it was a note app to help me better organize my notes instead of always scrambling for a piece of paper to write it down. But I bought the calendar that I already have, OOPS! So I deleted that app and I want to purchase the one app with the "sticky type notes". That looks neat and something that will help me for sure! Not a waste of money. As you can tell, or maybe not, I am "addicted and I just can't get enough" of my new phone. I just wonder, will I be able to keep up with the monhtly bill? I sure hope so, because I am in a 2 yr contract. I already owe Tmobile, I do not need another phone company after me. EEKS! Speaking of my phone, I got a word last night, on WORDS WITH FRIENDS that was 109 points! My best friend was shocked and showed me how to take a picture of it. Pretty neat. Unlike the "angry birds" that many love, I could care LESS for. I have never been interstede in those type of games, besides, I DONT HAVE TIME for that. I like the word game because it makes you think, makes that brain do some magic! I told myself on Wednesday, I am going to go PHONELESS and INTERNETLESS. I just want a break from technology. I dont want to be reached or have to continusely freak becasue I am thinking I am going to "die" if I dont see whats going on facebook every single second or the latest pictures and posts and what not. I just need a break from always constantly at my phone or my laptop. Have you ever felt that way? SO WEDNESDAY I WILL NOT BE AVAILABLE :)
Back to my list, I just would feel SO much better if I can get everything thats on my list accomplished for the day, but I just DONT. Especially with my nephew over like 24.6 I just cannot do it. I am always on top of the babies, and I dont ever have time for myself, to make myself look decent or even shower for taht matter. I always shower at night nowadays and look like you know what during the day. I am always trying to keep up with the house (living at home and not having to pay rent I feel I need to help, besides I have NEVER been a lazy person, always a HELPER). I cant stand doing nothing, So I am always doing laundary, dishes, cleaning the floor and the continuous messes my dad leaves in his area like its no tomorrow. MAKES ME HEATED i tell you.
The last couple days I had to let out a SCREAM. I feel bad because I just screamed (had to release it) and it scared my nephew and he started to cry. Two babies, the same age pretty much, are very demanding. Dont get me wrong, I love my nephew, but he lives here. I mise well adopt him seriously. I cant get much done. I worry about their needs and forget about my own stuff. My parents always tell me to leave hosuework and focus on them and what not but, I dont know about you but I CANNOT stand filth. Things have to be neat and ordered. ANd so as I sit here and blog, I am freaking because "my table" in the corner here has Sadie's clothes folded on it from tonight that I didnt get to do all day and my other list of things I need to get done. It just never stops. I am BEYOND overwhelemd and STRESSED.
My nephew got picked up today to go HOME where he belongs at 6 pm. Usually, her husband wouldnt pick him up until tomorrow (mid afternoon) since he is off tues to thursday but my dad insisted he be picked up tonight,. THANK GOD. I knew he was leaving at 6, I called my mom crying at 5 I just couldnt do it anymore. She reassured me he will be picked up. I changed into my jogging gear and as soon as my sister came and left, I was out the door with Sadie off for a nice run. I NEEDED THAT! Its amazing what that can do. I felt like almost, almsot a new person. Sweating and running with the music just relieves me. I kept thinking, here I am , working at it, and my sister goes and gets surgery. I am NOT a lazy person and it feels good to be able to say I run and I like to take care of myself (need to work double on that tho!)
So yesterday, I went to Target, to get one of my friends a birthday gift. She is the sweetest thing. I met her back almsot 6 years ago, at the Eating Disorder center when I went for 2 weeks. She is a petite little thing, 4'11 and has orange hair, just super cute reminds me of a MINI Lindsey Lohan (back in parent trap days) (def NOT like her one bit now) . She is quiet and is just super sweet has a heart of gold always has sent me things and I felt bad I had never been able to due to my money situation. Anways, I picked out her favorite gum, lipgloss and a $20 giftcard to Target (pretty sure she loves that store as well as I do! I swear I can spend a crapload of money in that store!) Well, I also bought 3 pairs of sockies for Sadie that were on CLEARANCE, I never really put socks on ehr anymore since its so damn hot here now (FL!) but I liked the colors (purple, pink, and white) and on sale! Can't beat that! I also rememebred I needed baby detergent. My mom always buys it for me but I thought this time let me buy it! I put everything on top of my doublestroller (I had both babies) and the degergent on the bottom since it was big. ($10 bottle). So I go up to the register pay for everything (or so I thought) (you can take a guess where I am going with this one). I had Sadie in my arm, my bag on my other arm pushing my nephew in the stroller and pushing them out to the car. I get to load them both in their carseats and I happen to look down and go "OH $h!t!". Yes, I TOTALLY forgot that I had the detergent!! I went back and forth decided should I go in there and tell them what happened and pay for it or just net time go and explain? Well I really did nto want to go back in, because I was dealing with the babies and they about had it. SO I choose to go on my way home. But on the drive, I felt SO SO SO guilty. I would NEVER intentionally steal, let alone with the babies thats just absurd. But, its been on my mind. OOPS!